However, there has been one common theme to something that has started sneaking onto my TV schedule of late.... That of weddings. Whether it's Four Weddings, Gypsy Weddings or Don't Tell The Bride, my TV schedule has noticed a distinct upturn in nuptially themed programming. Consequently, there has been an influx of some crazy ass bridezillas invading my living room of late and I'm not quite sure how I feel about it.
Now first of all, let me confess. I have a conflict of interest here as like most women of my age, I have my very own crazy bride story. Having spoken to a few women on this matter, it seems we have all known, been bridesmaid to, or witnessed a bridal brouhaha at some point or other. Mine involved being invited to be a bridesmaid, along with 3 other cohorts, to a former flatmate & university friend of many years. However following allegations of not creating a 'high enough standard' hen do despite several weeks of intense control freakery on her part, a heated discussion regarding the mental effects of a photocopier being temporarily placed in her private office (nothing to break down about, or so I was informed upon making my thoughts known), and other generally wedding themed dramas, I was petulantly despatched of my bridesmaid duties (as was one other who had the temerity to become pregnant 6 months before the wedding) along with my wedding invitation. Let it just be said therefore, I have witnessed the Bridezilla In Action.
But whether it's in my own friendship circle or on my tellybox, there seems to be quite the theme of soon to be brides losing their minds (and often good friends) in a pique of ivory coloured anger. It's a common theme, but why so? Well, I do understand that a wedding can be a stressful occasion, even more so with all pressure heaped upon the 'special day' by an industry seeking to claim a hefty wedge of your hard earned cash via the medium of a tawny owl delivered wedding ring, hand crafted Parisian style baked confection or whatever else they peddle at double the price of normal. And the feminist within me wholeheartedly recognises that the nerves of steel required to deal with said industry, peer pressure, or potential familial discord can often be misconstrued in women in a way men don't have to contend with. Men after all, are leaders or assertive, where women are almost always thought of as bossy or demanding in the same situation. So when women reject the traditional subservient, passive or innocent ideals of The Bride, to stand up for her rights to (if not party), get the flowers of her choice even if they are out of season/ insist upon a bare minimum of a £200 contribution to a honeymoon fund / select hideous dresses for her maids in order to improve her chances of being the most attractive on the day*, unfortunately those women then inevitably cop some flak in a way that men don't. Hence why you never hear of a groomzilla (that and it doesn't seem to roll off the tongue so easy) making it rather a uneven playing field to be trod.
However, even with all that being said, weddings do seem to bring out the loopiest behaviours in a woman that no other event ever does, and don't these programmes show it. Putting to one side the harsh editing, engineered personality clashes and high dramas that come hand in hand with reality TV, such programmes do, mostly, reflect at least a nugget of reality, as I know only too well. As for whether my friend and I are still on speaking terms, well I am afraid since her bridal meltdown she has never spoken to me again, which is as much a shame for her as it is for me. But on the flip side, I'm one honeymoon contribution better off and with my sanity & dignity still intact, so I think I know who the real winner is. That is, until it's MY turn.....
*delete as appropriate
Nice blog. But I think your readers would appreciate just a little bit more about what you did - or failed to do - for the hen night that resulted in the falling out.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sgt Pepper, glad you liked the blog. Re the hen night, well am sure it was more than just the night itself. However, *puts on sympathetic friend hat* unfortunately for her, I think a whole load of other issues came into play at the time too, after all weddings are quite stressful. But the final nail in the hen night coffin came when I offered a friend from out of town a place to stay at mine for the hen weekend, as she was unable to afford the weekend otherwise, as it necessitated at the brides demand a stay in a London hotel during the Summer Olympics. Quite an expensive time to be staying in London! This then duly meant me and said friend wouldn't be sleeping in the same place as all the other hens. When I pointed out to the bride she wouldn't even notice as she'd be, well sleeping & quite possibly sauced up to the eyeballs anyway, she grew angry & called me entirely unsympathetic. The fact I was facilitating the attendance of one of her (& indeed my) mates went ignored, unfortunately. That combined with the insensitive indifference shown at the dreaded noisy photocopier was the final straw that broke this that camels back, she truly did get the hump. Unfortunately.
ReplyDeleteAm sure she did sleep well though, and the high dramas & dudgeon had little effect on the outcome of her blessed day.... and eventual marriage. Not that I know any more.